Dear Miss Manners,
I may have recently committed a well-intentioned lapse in etiquette. A friend (co-worker, more than a mere acquaintance, but not exactly a Saturday-night kind of friend, although I'd like her to be) recently emailed me with a request to borrow a recipe. She's admired my culinary prowess before, so this is a compliment, but she was requesting a recipe to serve to her book club, relating to a specific book. Now, I'm an English-major bookworm nerd-type, and I was very excited to hear about a book club with people my age in it, reading books that I like. Naturally, I provided her with a recipe that I thought she'd like (well, I actually tailored a specific recipe for her and the book, but she doesn't need to know that!), but I insinuated in my reply that I'd love to be invited to her book club. I joked that I would give her a recipe in exchange for an invite to book club. Was this in poor form? I know it's rude to invite oneself anywhere, but I felt that by mentioning the club specifically in the email, she left the door open. After all, it's equally rude to mention a party to someone who's not invited, correct? I don't want to appear intrusive, but I really want to cultivate a friendship with this person, and I really *really* want to join a book club. Did I put my e-foot in my e-mouth? Or was my subtle hint an acceptable nudge? Please advise.